Olives When We Get Back Home

Why do I wonder or worry? Another day of being reassured by God of the path that we are taking and of His mighty hand in all things. Today was the supervised visit for A. I hadn't said anything to her about the visit until today because I was worried that something might change. I spoke with both the case manager and our CK manager about how to make this visit the best it could be on her. It wasn't so much that I was nervous about seeing her relatives, it was concern for how heartbroken she would be on the way home.
She has discovered a new activity of standing and looking in the refrigerator or looking into the pantry. She discovered a can of olives and wanted to have some. I said we would after her visit with mommy. Thus was our motto of the day, we'll have olives when we get back to the house.
We drove almost an hour and she had the pleasure of viewing Barbie Swan Lake in the luxury van. She did ask a few times "where we going?" I pulled into what I thought was the destination, but discovered it wasn't. Tried to get the stupid iPhone to pull up a new map but it wouldn't. A says,"Nina, CPS is up there." And wowsers, she's right. It made me think of how smart this 4 year old is but it also made me sad because why should she have to know where cps is. Stinkin world. We walk in and of course, there's a line, and I have to sign in and state why I'm there. Soon we get to go back to the visitors room. The case manager brings in a little 2 year old boy who is A's little half bro. He giggles and gives her a big hug. I'm not sure that she knows what to do. Pretty soon in comes bio mom and boyfriend. She's older than the 18 years I thought she might be. She is a beautiful young woman. She is teary when she hugs A and is very kind to me. She thanks me for taking care of A. She says A's hair looks so soft and pretty, I don't brag by telling her I am the funky-do master. I tell A I'll see her in a little while.
Now I have an 1 1/2. Taco Bell, McDonalds, Starbucks, Pizza Hut, or DQ. I take a little step back in time to my roots and go for a buster bar at DQ all by myself. Best one that I have ever had. Its also the first time in over a week I have been by myself. I definitely enjoyed the buster bar more than the time alone. And no, Todd, I didn't eat more than one! i head back to cps and have a small panic moment when I think that A's grandma might actually see inside my van. I look for a car wash on the way back but nope. I do a quick stash of an entire closet's worth of clothes and accessories into the very back and kick the goldfish crumbs, popcorn kernels and who knows what, under the floor mats. I mean, my house is darn near perfect ALL the time so it doesn't usually matter too much if the van is squalor. After all, its not even my squalor, its those three kids that travel with me.
I went back with 15 minutes left to the visit and got to go back and meet A's grandma, the one she calls mommy. Grandma immediately got teary and started thanking me. She'd brought many of A's special things and told me about foods she likes. It is easy to see where the kindness A exhibits comes from. When we left it was with a hug to A and a hug to me. We put on our best marching and marched to the van. Buckled her in and handed her the treats mommy had given her. I said we would see mommy in a week. No tears, no questions, all is calm. Thank you God for taking care of this sweet girl. Thank you for letting her feel safe in our home. We get home and open the can of olives. After all, I love black olives, too.