Peace

All snuggled into bed. Even Todd's reading light isn't keeping my eyes from falling shut. Then I hear it. The heart wrenching cry that happens every Tuesday after the visit as he falls into his deep sleeping pattern. I rush into his room and know that it's not the thunder that has caused the crying out. I don't know exactly what causes it other than the weekly visit. I shudder to think what in the world has this sweet boy been through that he has nightmares after seeing his birth mother. I pray over him and stroke his little arm. I listen to the thunder and see the flashes of lightning and now am comforted by God's amazing power. He has not nor will ever abandon this child.

J is asleep but I'm not. I am fluctuating between anger and peace. Anger that J has to go the visits when it is always upsetting to him afterwards. Peace in the fact that God reigns in my home. I don't know how we could do this without Him.