Hello

Even now, when I walk into their room, I get an incredible feeling of loneliness and sadness.  I guess it can be almost be like death.  My babies are gone.  This is the reason why most people can't do foster care.  Can't get past the incredible loneliness that dwells deep in your heart.  It's been somewhat of a rough 7 weeks.  The communication between BG & N's mom with me, hasn't been exactly like I thought it would be.  Another testament to the unknowns of foster care and the emotional roller coaster that it is.  I have gotten more projects completed in the house than imagined.  Todd & I got to go to NYC.  And now I am home and the quietness is too much.  I'm feeling like a slug.  I need more.  We had our family meeting on Monday to decide if we were ready as a family to go back on the foster care list.  Camille was the driving force behind it.  She is begging for some more children.  Everyone gave a thumbs up and Buddy gave a thumbs in the middle.  He'll go with the flow.  I think his is a combination of enjoying the quiet calmness around our house, but also I think he believes that no other children will capture our hearts like BG & N.  He may be right about the heart capturing.  I'm sure he's right about the quiet, too.  But, I can only handle so much quiet.  An hour after we had our vote, I received a text pic & message of Baby(our newborn we had for a month).  He had just had his 18 month doctor's visit and is doing perfectly.  I have never prayed over a child with the intensity that I prayed for him.  I am thankful for God in sending me the reassurance that this is what He has called us to do.  It is no coincidence of the timing of the picture.  Now, we wait for our call.  Our call about new foster kid or kids, that is.  We've already answered the call from God to foster.  "Hello, we are ready."